eelseason: (Facepalm.)
Jack Harkness ([personal profile] eelseason) wrote2010-10-18 09:40 pm

[BTR] Locked to Phoebe Donovan and Martha Jones


Dear diary.

Running out of reasons not to strangle my team.

[identity profile] thehighestwing.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 03:18 pm (UTC)(link)
I can't speak for anybody else but I go on because even if they wouldn't believe or understand what I am, humans are beautiful. Even at their most terrible, that's still humanity. I don't remember what it's like to be all human. You'd think I would. Wasn't that long ago I changed but I don't remember, so I can't imagine what it's like for you after living so long and what you've been through but I want you to remember. Even with the bad stuff, there's also good stuff and I want that for you.

No, I don't think it's been worked out. Some Firsts lose their compassion and don't remember what it's like to have a nature that's close to human. They prefer it that way. It serves them well as leaders, or so they think. But look at Romana.

I don't know how long I'll live. I'd say that's up to you but that's not fair. No one's taught me to be a certain way. What I've lived and what I've lost or done doesn't force me to be that way. I'm just like this even if I'd rather be different sometimes. I'd rather not care as much. I'd rather just accept some things are the way they are and people don't want to be protected by me or anyone. I'd rather not butt in since it's not what you want but I can't shut it off. Most of the time I don't want to because even if I'm wrong, it can't hurt to have someone trying.

[identity profile] thehighestwing.livejournal.com 2010-10-23 05:07 am (UTC)(link)
Okay. That all makes sense and that all sounds smart. It doesn't last forever, true.

But shouldn't life be about more than survival?

[identity profile] thehighestwing.livejournal.com 2010-10-23 04:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah. I guess for me, life without the good stuff would also be torture.

{{OOC: ;~;}}

Can we find a comfy middle? We do have time.